I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
Ramen noodles and uncensored jerry springer episodes, what a nice life i have.
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
My 10 year old son gave me a bottle of jameson for fathers day. Did you have something to do with this?
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
Hey its me your friend who impressed the pharmacist by already knowing the generic version of plan b by name
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
Randomize
