We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
after the first blizzard, i went out and bought a thirty and put it in a cooler and hid it out in the backyard. now the second blizzard has deposited 2 feet of snow on top of said cooler. there is a shovel and treasure map over here waiting for you
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
I'm petting the cat while shitting. This is all I ever wanted
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
I'm going to miss recovering from hangovers on the beach. Rolling around in my dorm bed and watching Friends reruns is just gonna feel like slumming it.
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
I told her we had to stay at the bar until at least midnight because that's when my direct deposit hit, don't tell me i'm not responsible
If you gave someone an std. would you say a muffin basket, a candy gram or an edible arrangement is a better choice to send them?
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
Randomize