he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
I feel bad for her, but I feel like she's one of those resource-raping alien civilizations that visits planets, decimates them and then leaves. Those really aren't the qualities I appreciate in a friend. Ya know?
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
On the way out the door to work grabbed the wine glass on the floor left for the ghost of Elijah and chugged it. PASSOVER.
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
You know that panicky moment when you go home with a guy and realize you’ve been there before?!? HAPPENING RIGHT NOW!!!
Turns out I banged his son a few months ago but the kids back at college so I don’t have to worry about him walking in while Dad has me bent over the couch
Randomize