I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
i was sitting on the kitchen floor shaking my gallon of vodka at people and asking if they wanted to climb the heaven hill... getting dumped is the best thing that has ever happend to me
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