Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
I mistook a propane tank for a keg.
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
Rolled in at 3:30am from the strip club, with all the screaming I did, Siri doesn't even recognize my voice this morning,
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
I said "one day" and that day is not today
Btw, the reason I have a black eye is bc I needed to puke so hard yesterday morning; I whipped up the toilet seat so fast that I railed myself in the face. Then spent the rest of the day more carefully puking. Kind of why I'm not in the mood for drinking.
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