She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
my parents have to start far too many of our conversations with the sentence "this is an observation, not a judgment" than I'm proud of
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
She can't take shots?!? Literally if I could list that as a skill on a resume I would
Randomize
