shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
I'm pretty sure you called me last night and screamed that she was force-feeding you a bagel.
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
Are you feeling okay?
Right now, not a single thing feels even slightly okay. That hungover.
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
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