He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
we were the definition of too high: argued for 10 minutes about who was gonna get the condom (it was 2 feet away on the night stand) and past out watching adventure time.
We tried to play tennis but after about 15 minutes we gave up and fucked against the fence. Woulda been a cute third date so of course I had to ruin it.
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
Randomize
