Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
seriously who else gets carried home puking from a fucking mary kay party?
Have invented new cocktail. Any flavor of crystal light and vodka. I call it "I am going to die alone"
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
This is why Helen Keller didn't drink
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
Randomize
