Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
Hello Stephanie, you need to come pick me up at Par Blvrd correctional facility and bring $750-$1000 for bail. I just got a DUI. Thank you.
What!?!?! How are you txting?!
Because this is Officer Reynolds, and I just arrested your boyfriend.
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
He got the life proof phone case so he could jack off in the shower without his wife knowing
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
I've been drunk texting you for weeks, and you watched me puke outside your house... I say it's time we meet in person.
do nipples grow back?
Randomize
