you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
I'm trying to get WebMD to diagnose me with a hangover
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
I came so hard my ears popped.
Omg. I checked my purse this morning and I'm pretty sure drunk me stole a frat guys tube of crest 3d white toothpaste. Like that's pretty fucked up but I think if I knew someone did that to me I'd probably still invite them over again cuz I'd be like, "this girl's creative, and has good hygiene."
Randomize
