you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
Just had to explain my "wine me. Dine me. Sixty-nine me" key chain to my grandma...she took it surprisingly well.
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
Are you proud of yourself?
ask me again when I'm drunk. Then fuck off.
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
Randomize
