Midget sex pt 2 tonight
It's more exciting when they aren't single....and even better when you have to pretend that you just slept with their roommate while trying to do the walk a shame as their girlfriend comes marching into the apt.
Im not the least bit jealous of the life you lead.
He's coming over tonight...I really wish I didn't have my period right now...
I believe I'm witnessing the first time ever that you wished your period would NOT come....
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
That which doesn't kill you gives you an excuse to get shitfaced later
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
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