I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
Get everyone into the kitchen. I need you all to witness me friend-zoning him. Just in case.
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
Randomize
