the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
Urine might work for jellyfish stings, but we found out it doesn't work well for nose bleeds...
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
Randomize
