I saved $70 from being to drunk to go out last night so I figured I could buy a new watch.
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
P.S. I just watched The Muppets. I feel like I just got a sadness enema.
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
what are you getting to drink for new years?
well seeing as how i just got diagnosed with a uti, whatever we can mix with cranberry juice
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
Randomize
