Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
Some kids in a school bus just saw me jacking off in my car. This is how 89% of children find out about sex.
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
Accidentally searched up "pizza pasties" instead of "pizza pastries". I was not disappointed.
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
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