i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
but then i turned into a human whiteboard because i thought it was a good idea to bring out markers
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
I woke up to him peeing by our bedroom door. I yelled at him to go to the bathroom and he just kept peeing while he walked there. This is a new low.
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
Randomize
