don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
I got to work, greeted my staff, then went into the bathroom to throw up. Who hired me to run a business???
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
i think the title to my autobiography shall be, "a bottle of vodka and various pieces of meat"
and this is why you're my favorite gay friend.
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
It seems that I didn’t convey clearly enough how well and truly fucked we are, Jack. Listen to me very closely: we are DEAD.
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