Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
I'll have you know...trying to masturbate while a song about jesus is stuck in your head is next to impossible
no today was horrible, i woke up and somebody slit my car tire and left an apology letter in my wiper that said "sorry wrong house"
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
im taking a nap outside. wake me up in an hour.
way to go to work and not wake me up. when you get home youre rubbing me with aloe and giving me a blowjob. no excuses
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
Left and drinking by a bar by myself. Everyone is in pajamas. I'm in a tuxedo. This is my life.
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man
Randomize
