so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
Kris Allen: Jason Mraz mixed with John Mayer and a splash of orgasmmm
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
it's not cheating when I paid for it
I just wished the taco bell drive thru guy a happy cinco de mayo. Who says arizonians hate mexicans?
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
If I should ask "why am I still single?" could someone please remind me of shooting mike and ikes out of my nose at the bartender last Saturday. many thanks
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
She's eating hot cheetos out of the bag with chopsticks, Matt, how is she NOT my soulmate?
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
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