some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
Is a box of franzia too insincere of a gift for "i'm sorry I backed into your toddler with my car"?
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
I just made the pizza guy say helicopter six times in order to get his money. Even he knows how stoned we are.
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
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