Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
Dude I just picked up a married chick while her husband was playing pool.
What do you mean you picked her up? How are you gonna leave the bar?
I didn't. I fucked her in the men's room. Come get me before he finds out.
I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
Just cropdusted the office
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
Like there's an 87% chance I'll end up on the bedroom floor demanding sex while freestyling in your face. I'm going to buy rum.
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
Randomize
