if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
He unbuckled his belt, tipped his hat at me, then told me to "saddle up"
this is like your 5th cowboy right? where do you keep finding these guys?!!
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
I think i got beer on your cat.
Randomize
