I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
You're a waste of cheezeits
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
What am I even going to do with 20 more jello shots? And don't say give them to the cat
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
I know its 2 in the morning and everything. But i just straight up yelled "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THIS WORLD IS DIFFICULT ENOUGH AS IT IS WITHOUT YOU PULLING THIS BULLSHIT ON ME" to my taco. Because it fell apart on me. I think i might be cracking under this finals pressure.
I'm kind of pissed I'm not hungover, that means I could have totally drank more last night.
I mean I'm completely serious and also drunk.
What a great combination.
Randomize
