Found moms dildo in drawer while looking for socks, and its wet
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
The gym has a pool
my gym membership just went from "way to get in shape" to "place to go swim when I'm high"
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
I've never felt more disgusting in my life. And I'm including the time I snuggled that homeless woman in the puddle of my whiskey vomit.
Just found out my rents have been paying my siblings to cockblock me for the past 5 years
Not as covert as you thought huh?
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
Randomize
