Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
so i have my big date this weekend, and i was practicing giving head with a bottle in the shower. i stopped and looked at the botton of the bottle. it was PURE MOLD! if i die, dont tell the doctors how this happened....
so you had a one ended conversation with the toilet las night in between barfs. you kept telling the toilet how strong it was because its gone through a lot of shit in its life.
drunk me is so punny.
I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
sorry didn’t mean to call you, i was just trying to put the t-rex emoji beside your name
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
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