? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
Gonna be hard to top last New Year's Eve when the guy I blew came at midnight
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
You punched me in the face while blackout. 20 min later I told you I'd been punched in the face and you yelled 'by who, imma go kill 'em!'
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
Randomize
