yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
Being single is awesome because I can still drink a bottle of wine and hate myself, but I don't have to shave my legs!
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
Randomize
