Grow some girl-balls and come out already
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
i just licked mashed potatoes off my blackberry. i'm not even ashamed to admit that to you.
The hospital said it would be 'irresponsible' for them to allow people to book stomach pumps.
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
I'm just going to eat my milkshake, watch teen wolf, masturbate, and lament my inability to form meaningful relations with men who aren't gay
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
Someone has big plans this weekend. Just went to throw away the trash and saw packaging for 3 different vibrators on the top of the stack
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
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