Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
Im covered in coffee vomit and urine and none of which are mine
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
Randomize
