Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
omh. i just found SHIT IN THE SHOWER! who the fuck does that? and why do i always seem to find it?
I just rubbed my dick on something in your apartment. Can you guess what?
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
You can't just hum the Jaws theme song when you pull down my pants.
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
They put me in charge of something. Why the fuck would you look at me and put me in charge of something while i'm double fisting peach mimosas at a baby shower
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
I was just like oh sorry I'm peeling meanwhile my legs are on either side of his head and I look like a fucking Komodo dragon
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
Randomize