in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
I just found your spare underwear and the half eaten granola bar you left in my purse.
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
She left you responsible for her guinea pig for what, 3 hours? And it somehow died under your care? I will no longer trust you with so much as a beer.
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
what the fuck is wrong with you
Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?
Randomize
