Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
There're making snowcones with the leftover vodka from last night. This is not the time to be making up excuses!
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
I am on my way right now and I SWEAR TO GOD IF YOU EAT MY BURRITO YOU WILL NEVER SEE MY TITS AGAIN
Dude you were so wasted you thought a fake electric candle was real and tried to light your cig with it. Multiple times.
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
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