yo i just woke up i feel so weird, and the absolut is still fill, so is the 30, what the fuck did we drink last night man? And will you please come out of the bathroom.
Bro... we didn't even hang out last night??
He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
I feel like if your cat could talk she would call me a cunt.
Hemmingway ran to paris to avoid going to the university of illinois and becoming a doctor. It was there he developed a drinking problem. I need a plane ticket.
Dude, just paid my sister in vicodin to go out and buy me a slushie.
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
well his attempt to make a white russian with instant coffee, gone off milk, and that weird probably illegal vodka we bought the other day isnt going well
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
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