I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
We've been friends for six months, when do my benefits kick in?
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
