i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
Just saw a cop give four blondes gas for their car on their way to Vegas. They seriously ran out of gas and called 911 about it. Its like a porno plot.
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
You coulda licked the floor this morning and got drunk.
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
Randomize