you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
she said she wouldn't go home with me until she looked up my name in her sex offender app. do i really give off that vibe?
Yeah. It's not just the beard either.
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
Let's put a bunch of beers in a backpack and shotgun them in a Red Lobster bathroom
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
Just found out that the guy I lost my virginity to voted for Gary Johnson. It's almost more upsetting then him ending up being a massive asshole.
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
Randomize
