PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
I got vodka in my stocking. Having an alcoholic mom has paid off.
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
Just brought out that old CCM hockey helmet. The one covered in sharpie penises with "DRUNK BUCKET" written across the front. The number of tally marks / initials from tonight's drunk stunts alone is equal parts inspiring and alarming.
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
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