Just saw my boss eat a banana in three bites.
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
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