Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
They woke me up at 4 in the morning screaming "drunk adventure time!" because they needed a sober chaperone. They made me walk them around the block shoeless.
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
I CAN CONTROL MY GERBIL WITH MY BREATH. HE FOLLOWS THE SMELL. PROBABLY WOULDNT BE AS EXCITING IF I WASNT HIGH OFF MY ASS, BUT STILL
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
He sent me a dick pic from work, but I could see all the pizzas in the background. Now I'm just hungry.
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
My dad is sitting where you rode me
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
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