DAMN! I hate it when i drunkenly erase all my "sent message" and wake up in the morning and my inbox is full of "WTF?" and "Huh?" messages.
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
OH MY GOD! I CAN FEEL A PULSE IN MY BALLS IT HURTS! ITS LIKE MINI FEMINIST NINJAS ARE ATTACKING MY BALLS!!!
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
Randomize
