So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
bring money and cleavage
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
Randomize
