home. puking in laundry basket.
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
I'm dedicating this beer to drunk texting
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
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