You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
I'm going to fuck my way out of the friend zone if its the last thing I do
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
I just dropped a condom on the floor at costco in front of my girlfriend and her husband. Today is not going to go well.
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
Randomize
