just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
You think my vibrator will be okay in the dishwasher?
Randomize