I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
Omphalophobia is a real thing. don't ever fucking touch my belly button again dude
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
That's how pantless uber rides happen
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
Nah, just stick him in a closet with some cheetos, a blunt and soda. The darkness will calm him down until Mallory can be located.
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize
