watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
i wish sherlock holmes were still around today... he'd be able to find my g-spot.
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
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