Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
In my defense, there are at least three ways to die doing that, and I'm still here. America, Fuck Yeah!
This can only be settled by a dance off.
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
He had me sit on his face until I begged him to stop, then held me there 5 minutes longer. I rested my head on his chest, told him I needed time to recover....and slept for 6 hours. By the time I woke, he was already at work. I just sent him a countdown times until his shift is over.
Randomize