I knew you were gonna be a good wingman when the words "dibs on the chunky one" came out of your mouth.
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
She opened a beer bottle with her armpit and then gave me a cigarette from the waistband of her underwear. I dont know if I want to be her or marry her.
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
Guess who won a bet and gets to name it Optimus prime if it's a boy
Nevermind. Totally worth it.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
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